technofascist elimination movement/typewriter of death

JOIN the T.E.M.

become a technofascist elimination MOVEMENT member FOR LIFE!

 

any typewriter purchase qualifies the buyer for a lifetime T.E.M. membership!  that means ’til you die!  DIE!

make sure to share your membership with nobody.  ’cause it’s nobody’s f’n business and that’s what the T.E.M. is about!  and exclamation points!  WOOO!!!

the TECHNOFASCIST ELIMINATION MOVEMENT UTILITY RANT AGAINST DIGITAL BULLSHIT (continued)

typewriter.works wide + slogan logo
typewriters:  not planning to kill us all
MAGACADABRA! now you'll believe anything
CONTINUED:

the way out of the mass grave of forgotten nobodies starts with a TYPEWRITER .WORKS machine (surprise!), a bold sign of independence against the latest & greatest digital zombie gadgets of tomorrow’s obsolescence.  our typewriters-as-art are signals against the lazy users of artificial intelligence, a skull-n-crossbones pirate flag of freedom, old school punk rock DIY. T .W machines are a big FUCK YOU to the desperate need of being seen by a few hundred social media randos overdosed on low cultural denominator entertainment porn, russian-made conspiracy memes and the dull conformity of gray & black flatland screens.

with a TYPEWRITER .WORKS analog art machine one can forge a path of emancipation from the hungry ghosts of missing out on bullshit.  because just setting a typewriter on your desk lowers blood pressure and promotes positive mental health.  imagine what happens when you actually write with it!  for one, typewriter use enhances critical thinking.  boy, do we need more of that.

imagine a nation of advanced critical thinkers.  come to think of it, the world began to turn to shit when people stopped using typewriters.  bill gates & steve jobs fucked us.   digital life has softened our minds and enfeebled our bodies.  we’re fatter and much stupider.

anyway, every typewriter we make includes a TWO-YEAR MECHANICAL WARRANTY and we are the world’s only typewriters which boast the ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE SURVIVOR GUARANTEE.

your typewriter will endure beyond the zombie apocalypse or your brains are FREE!*

finally, every TYPEWRITER .WORKS shopping cart purchase over $39.99 will include a free lifetime membership of the TECHNOFASCIST ELIMINATION MOVEMENT plus maybe a random serving of T.E.M. stickers, chosen for you by the traveller, the TYPEWRITER .WORKS rescue dog.  seriously.  he’s good at it.  also, if you’re a couple bucks short of 40, we’re likely to send you a certified and numbered lifetime bodhisattypewriter card, anyway.

bodhisattypewriter means “awakened type writer.”  hey, THAT’S YOU!

* brains not guaranteed to be human. or mammal. void where prohibited. not valid in texas, florida, louisiana, alabama and arkansas. they’re already zombies.

GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN!

note:    yes, this is the use of digital means to carry out the (darkly humorous) destruction of digital life by putting T.E.M. stickers EVERYWHERE which are sold, uh, digitally.  read “the job” by wm. s. burroughs for much more insight.  also, remember that over-quoted quote by whitman about contradiction multitudes.  LARGE!

TECHNOFASCIST ELIMINATION MOVEMENT // TYPEWRITERS PROMOTE POSITIVE MENTAL HEALTH

YOUR FANTASTIC ART TYPEWRITER LIFE BEGINS with one email:

11 + 15 =

technofascist elimination h.q.

185 jb lane

sharps chapel, tn  37866

open hours

M – F:  10am – 6pm (eastern time)

S – S:  whatever i feel like

Email

a.i.sucks@typewriter.works